The NBA Comparison Series: DeVon Hardin

NBADraft.net is a great Web site. They do a ton of really detailed scouting, compile all the best NBA news and prospect reports and are generally the best resource for the NBA Draft. But there is a catch. Those NBA Comparisons given for each prospect. Some of them are completely ridiculous. I've spent a lot of time reviewing them, not to learn more about potential draftees, but to laugh hysterically for hours and hours. By my count, the greatest comparison ever is Josh McRoberts, whose NBA Comparison is...

Chris Webber (less athletic)... yes, less athletic than Chris Webber. Last time I checked Josh was not in a wheelchair.

Anyway, I loathe comparing players to each other when it comes to style of play. I'd like to think basketball, in all its glory, is a free-moving game where in the infinite combinations of movement, athletic ability and skill sets that the sport allows to be expressed, no two players can be all that similar. Like snowflakes... or some crap. There are too many factors in this game and too much freedom to define a player by anything but his own unique ability. Ken Pomeroy wrote a great piece on this over at Basketball Prospectus, mocking the way most people only compare white players to other white players, or lefties to other lefties or how any factor unrelated to style of play seems to creep into most people's assessment of a player. So allow me to introduce a new series here at SSS where I handpick some of the more ridiculous comparisons over there and offer some thrilling analysis. Enjoy!

Previously: Roy Hibbert (Joel Pryzbilla); Brook Lopez (Rasho Nesterovic)

Today: DeVon Hardin, California

Strengths: Athletic, good body for a pro 4, good shot blocker, patient in the paint, destroying his own bones.

Weaknesses: Outside shot, unpolished post game, average passer out of post, calcium.

NBA Comparison: Darryl Dawkins

Continue...

Why would I profile a player that few people get to see and was injured for most of last season? Because he is, for some completely inexplicable reason, being compared to Chocolate Thunder himself, the alien from Lovetron, expert in interplanetary funkmanship, Darryl freaking Dawkins. Dawkins' entire legacy was based on the fact that he not only defied comparison to any other player, but any other human, except maybe George Clinton or Darren Daulton. So why is this low-profile, seemingly non-crazy (4.0 GPA in high school, major in social welfare) player, Hardin, compared to him? Well, I doubt the young scouting prodigies at NBADraft.net have even seen Dawkins play (he retired in 1984, neither have I) and while they say Hardin "Loves to dunk the ball over guys," I'm not sure what footage they have been watching. So I can only assume it's to amuse me. I mean, look at this animal.



As far as I know, Hardin has not shattered any backboards and if he has, he certainly didn't name the damn thing the "Chocolate Thunder Flying, Robinzine Crying, Teeth Shaking, Glass Breaking, Rump Roasting, Bun Toasting, Wham, Bam, Glass Breaker I Am Jam." Although I've heard Hardin does use that exact line to pick up some of the more promiscuous campus co-eds. But don't we all? According to Wikipedia, Dawkins also named dunks: Rim Wrecker, Go-Rilla, Look Out Below, In-Your-Face Disgrace, Cover Your Head, Yo-Mama, and Spine-Chiller Supreme, all of which are also the titles of 70s porn films.

Upon even further review, the comparison makes even less sense. Dawkins entered the draft as a raw high school player, albeit one of the most dominating ever by some accounts and is recognized as a guy who never reached his potential. Hardin is a tested senior who will take little time to reach his potential. Dawkins was the 5th pick, Hardin is slated at No. 21 by NBADraft.net. Dawkins claimed to have a space girlfriend named Juicy Lucy. Alas, Hardin can only manage Sandy Mandy.

More Appropriate Comparison, If Such Things Were Productive: Hilton Armstrong

Less Appropriate Comparison, Because Such Things Are Humorous: Mr. Glass

The NBA Comparison Series: Brook Lopez

NBADraft.net is a great Web site. They do a ton of really detailed scouting, compile all the best NBA news and prospect reports and are generally the best resource for the NBA Draft. But there is a catch. Those NBA Comparisons given for each prospect. Some of them are completely ridiculous. I've spent a lot of time reviewing them, not to learn more about potential draftees, but to laugh hysterically for hours and hours. By my count, the greatest comparison ever is Josh McRoberts, whose NBA Comparison is...

Chris Webber (less athletic)... yes, less athletic than Chris Webber. Last time I checked Josh was not in a wheelchair.

Anyway, I loathe comparing players to each other when it comes to style of play. I'd like to think basketball, in all its glory, is a free-moving game where in the infinite combinations of movement, athletic ability and skill sets that the sport allows to be expressed, no two players can be all that similar. Like snowflakes... or some crap. There are too many factors in this game and too much freedom to define a player by anything but his own unique ability. Ken Pomeroy wrote a great piece on this over at Basketball Prospectus, mocking the way most people only compare white players to other white players, or lefties to other lefties or how any factor unrelated to style of play seems to creep into most people's assessment of a player. So allow me to introduce a new series here at SSS where I handpick some of the more ridiculous comparisons over there and offer some thrilling analysis. Enjoy!

Previously: Roy Hibbert (Joel Pryzbilla)
Next Up: Brook Lopez

Strengths: NBA-ready frame with great athleticism, shot blocking, good touch from 15 feet in, XBox.

Weakness: Post moves, staying out of foul trouble, attending things.

NBA Comparison: Rasho Nesterovic
Continue...

We could get into Lopez's academic troubles this year and how it affects his draft status, but that doesn't really pertain to our comparison besides the fact that both the Slovenian Nesterovic and Lopez have seen very little of the inside of an American university classroom (incidentally, Lopez was just granted eligibility and will begin playing immediately). With Lopez being slotted at No. 16 and Nesterovic being the whipping boy of even the most inane columnist, Screamin' Stephen A. Smith, the same dynamic as we saw with Hibbert and Przybilla could be in place. Is NBADraft.net predicting Lopez will be overrated just as Nesterovic, the 17th pick of the 1998 draft, was when he was drafted?

But we already tackled those issues of time travel in the first NBA Comparison, let's look closer at the actual players. First, Lopez, and I don't need to be an anthropologist to figure this out, is not Slovenian. Because we do not discriminate at SSS, this of no matter. However, there does tend to be a certain style that European centers, specifically woefully mediocre ones, exhibit. Allow me to bring on expert of all things Nesterovic, and nothing else, Stephen A. Smith himself.

(Enter Stephen A. Smith)

RASHO NESTEROVIC HATES CONTACT AS MUCH AS HOWIE MANDEL. RA-SHO NEST-ER-O-VIC AVERAGES 0.6 BLOCKS PER GAME. THOSE NUMBERS ARE PALTRY BY ANY STRETCH OF THE IMAGINATION. INSERT MISUSED CLICHE OR 25-CENT WORD HERE.

(Exit Stephen A. Smith)

Interesting Stephen. Brook Lopez is an outstanding shot blocker, averaging 1.7 per game last year, including a 12 block game against USC. He rarely ventures outside of the paint and keeps his offensive arsenal to deft jump hooks, relentless offensive board work and the occasional mid-range jumper. Nesterovic is basically a spot-up 18-foot shooter on offense and merely a lane clogger on D. Good point, Stephen.

(Enter Stephen A. Smith)

THANK YOU. IT IS A GOOD POINT BECAUSE I SAID IT. TO COMPARE THE TWO IS DESPICABLE AND EGREGIOUS. THAT'S LIKE SAYING LOPEZ IS NO BETTER THAN SLA-VA MED-VE-DENKO, ITS JUST THAT SIMPLE. YOU GOTTA COME WITH SOMETHING BETTER THAN THAT NBADRAFT.NET FOUNDER ARAN SMITH.

(Exit Stephen A. Smith, for much better impersonation, click those links, or go here)

Yes, clearly Stephen, now could you please get out of my face. Here's a cupcake for your time... and an altoid. Um, yeah, so as you can see, even the biggest expert on Rasho Nesterovic (and, again, nothing else) finds this to be a humorous, if not enraging, comparison. At least Lopez can look at Rasho's nearly $8 million a year salary as consolation.

More Appropriate Comparison, If Such Things Were Productive: Andris Biedrins

Less Appropriate Comparison, Because Such Things Are Humorous: Robin Lopez

The NBA Comparison Series: Roy Hibbert

NBADraft.net is a great Web site. They do a ton of really detailed scouting, compile all the best NBA news and prospect reports and are generally the best resource for the NBA Draft. But there is a catch. Those NBA Comparisons given for each prospect. Some of them are completely ridiculous. I've spent a lot of time reviewing them, not to learn more about potential draftees, but to laugh hysterically for hours and hours. By my count, the greatest comparison ever is Josh McRoberts, whose NBA Comparison is...

Chris Webber (less athletic)... yes, less athletic than Chris Webber. Last time I checked Josh was not in a wheelchair. I peed my pants when I read this, literally.

Anyway, I loathe comparing players to each other when it comes to style of play. I'd like to think basketball, in all its glory, is a free-moving game where in the infinite combinations of movement, athletic ability and skill sets that the sport allows to be expressed, no two players can be all that similar. Like snowflakes... or some crap. There are too many factors in this game and too much freedom to define a player by anything but his own unique ability. Ken Pomeroy wrote a great piece on this over at Basketball Prospectus, mocking the way most people only compare white players to other white players, or lefties to other lefties or how any factor unrelated to style of play seems to creep into most people's assessment of a player. So allow me to introduce a new series here at SSS where I handpick some of the more ridiculous comparisons over there and offer some thrilling analysis. Enjoy!

First up: Roy Hibbert

Strengths: Good hands, touch around the rim; can hit face-up jumper from 12 feet in; makes up for lack of athleticism with good positioning at both ends; closer to sky than most earthbound creatures.

Weaknesses: Can't get up and down the court easily; limited athleticism; can't remember how to jump.

NBA Comparison: Joel Przybilla

What's interesting about this one is not the black/white thing, if anything that aspect is progressive and racially harmonious and NBADraft.net founder Aran Smith should be recognized for his contributions to the basketball civil rights movement. (mild applause)

What interests me is that they have Hibbert all the way up at No. 9 in the draft. As far as I know, Joel Przybilla is a bad basketball player. So by comparing the two, they are essentially predicting Hibbert will be a bust in the NBA, right?

That brings up a fascinating mock draft dynamic. Do you account for the stupidity of NBA GMs when mocking a draft? If they think Hibbert will end up like Joel Przybilla, who was also the ninth pick, in the 2000 draft, but probably wouldn't be a first rounder if they did it over again, are they predicting that some poor GM will make the same mistake by overrating Hibbert? Why else would they have someone so Przybillian at No. 9 if its based strictly on pro potential? If they can not only predict a player's NBA potential but the exact reaction NBA GMs will have to his potential, I am not sure I should even be reading content with such precise prognosticating ability. I would hate to get caught in a time warp at the expense of Roy Hibbert and Joel Przybilla.

More Appropriate Comparison, If Such Things Were Productive: Bill Cartwright

Less Appropriate Comparison, Because Such Things Are Humorous: Lurch